It's not that I'm upset. I'm just disappointed. I often am told, "I like stouts but not ales...". Well guess what fancy pants, a stout is an ale. So is that fruity beer your bff Jill likes to smash so when her boobs come out she can 'blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol'. To hopefully alleviate some of this confusion, I am going to give you the quick lowdown.

There are two types of beer: ales and lagers. Ales are any type of beer that is brewed at higher temperatures (60-75°F). It's the higher temp that allows the specific type of yeast to ferment and quicker than lager yeast. Lagers are brewed at lower temps (around 34°F) and then further stored in cooler temperatures to mature. Lager is a German word meaning "to store". Aside from obvious labeling, a lager will almost always announce itself with lighter, more crisp flavors. Almost always hay/straw in color. Pilsners, marzens and bocks are all prime examples of a lager. There's really not much more to lagers so that leaves just about everything else as an ale. Only a few random styles make an appearance in a 'hybrid' category.

So there you go. Next time your butthole friend says "Fuck IPA's! Give me a real ale!", you can tell him to go suck a randall. An IPA is an ale. CHEERS!